The
following is an excerpt from "Porn Escape -- Confidently Walk Free from
the Prison of Pornography."
Let me tell you something you probably don’t want to hear: You are going to have slips along the way. It is very unlikely that you will be able to go from a porn addiction to complete abstinence from porn in one linear process. Naturally, you should do all you can to minimize these slips. As time goes on, they should be less and less frequent and less serious. But they will happen.
At times like that, you need to beware of what even serious psychologists refer to as the “what-the-hell effect”. Well known to dieters, this is when you are so discouraged by a small deviation from your plan that you give up the plan altogether. And that’s why it’s a lot easier to spend money once you’ve broken into that $50 bill!
So what should you do? An article in The Guardian newspaper makes the point humorously: “For 90% of its journey, an [airplane] will be off course, yet it reaches its destination nonetheless. I’m told this is aeronautically dubious, but you get the point: course-correcting is the essence of good flying, not an aberration from it. Anyway, who’d want to be on board a plane with a captain whose response to making a minor error was to say, 'What the hell!'‚ then give up trying to avoid further errors? Not me.”
Suppose you were learning to lift weights. You do this by lifting progressively heavier weights as time goes on. But sometimes you try to lift a particular weight, and you fail. Now, this does not matter much in the grand scheme of things. After failing to lift a weight, you don’t revert to zero strength; you just aren’t quite as strong as you thought you were. All you need to do is continue where you left off. Soon, you’re lifting heavier weights again.
That is the process you must follow in leaving behind porn addiction. When you have a slip, you aren’t returning to the base line. You’ve still learned a lot about self-regulation and the techniques you need to succeed. You simply haven’t mastered them well enough – yet. But if you persevere, you will.
You must carefully reflect on this point until you have completely bought into it. Your mind will resist the idea. It’s much more fun to give yourself the instant gratification of telling yourself you’ll never view porn again. Don’t do it. The reason I’m making this clear is that if you aren’t prepared for it, a slip can be devastating. Maybe for whatever reason you naively thought that this program would solve your problem and that everything would be fine. You need to prepare for slips so you know exactly what to do.
When You Have a Slip
So, what should you do if you have a slip? Read further in Porn Escape: Confidently Walk Free from the Prison of Pornography.
In
it, you'll learn more than a dozen techniques that can help you get
free from your porn compulsion. You will see:
- Why shame and guilt don't work as motivators and what you can do about it.
- What personality traits can help you overcome your porn dependence.
- Why positive thinking can be lethal to your escape from porn.
- How to develop an escape plan to deal with triggers.
- How to execute your escape plan with the confidence and skill of a pro.
- The right and wrong way to promote success through visualization.
- The winning formula for changing your actions.
- Why it might be better not to count days of abstinence.
WHAT
IS YOUR PORN ADDICTION COSTING YOU?
- Money?
- Time?
- Relationships?
- Opportunities to develop skills?
- Peace of mind?
- Clean conscience?
P.S. Don't want
to have a book on porn on your Kindle? There are solutions!
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